The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize