Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
