considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
You pole danced in your parka.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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