I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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