he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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