my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
