We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
