I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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