dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
My vagina is very pro this idea
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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