not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
