im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
