Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
