Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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