Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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