Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
