I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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