Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
We were destined to go to rehab together
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
