1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize