Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Randomize