This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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