I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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