AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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