how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize