Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
