Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
