You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
