I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Just cropdusted the office
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
what is it with giant penises always finding me
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I think I just shit out all my problems.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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