You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize