So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Randomize
