It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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