god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
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