like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Randomize
