In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Sponge bath it is.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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