Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Randomize