My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
