I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
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