we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Randomize
