don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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