it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize