maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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