do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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