i think my mom watched the whole time
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Randomize