I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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