Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Randomize
