I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
