some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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