so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
