So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
