OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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