My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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