David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
